Oof, yes I can definitely relate. While we don't have children, my time in the trenches of caregiving definitely included moments like this one. And I have failed on multiple occasions (including one just a couple weeks ago) to adequately express my needs to my partner, giving in to anger, then shame, then anger about my shame, then shame about my anger, etc. etc. etc.
We're still working on it, too, but that's the thing about partnership--I don't think you ever figure it all out perfectly. We grow and change with the years, and the great thing about being so close to someone for that long is that each trial you overcome together gives you more faith that you can handle anything that comes your way.
Thanks for these kind sharings! I love the part about “anger, then shame, then anger about my shame, then shame about my anger”—LOL, and sooo true!! May we keep growing and learning to relate better to our partners and ourselves. 💗
Oof, yes I can definitely relate. While we don't have children, my time in the trenches of caregiving definitely included moments like this one. And I have failed on multiple occasions (including one just a couple weeks ago) to adequately express my needs to my partner, giving in to anger, then shame, then anger about my shame, then shame about my anger, etc. etc. etc.
We're still working on it, too, but that's the thing about partnership--I don't think you ever figure it all out perfectly. We grow and change with the years, and the great thing about being so close to someone for that long is that each trial you overcome together gives you more faith that you can handle anything that comes your way.
I'm glad you've been able to improve things!
Thanks for these kind sharings! I love the part about “anger, then shame, then anger about my shame, then shame about my anger”—LOL, and sooo true!! May we keep growing and learning to relate better to our partners and ourselves. 💗