Little mind, life is not
  a puzzle to solve,
nor a mountain 
  to finally climb.

It's a sandbox you're in,
  with the sand you are given,
each moment 
  at a time.

In the notebook

This one departs from my usual in that it is purely a reflection on my own past journey (featuring high-control religion and undiagnosed autism).

Wherever you are in your own life journey, may you find ways to recognize and honor your own unique needs, rather than demonize them.

All those times I thought I was wrong

  and sinful for wanting to run and hide

from the pious, pushy, worshipping throng--

  I just had different needs inside.

In the notebook

The weight you've been trying to hold
  from the way you were treated and told
you'd better shape up, instead
  of being supported and led--
this burden's still keeping you bound.
  It's okay to start setting it down.

In the notebook

The rules 
    we learn to follow
        follow us

and sometimes chase us down
    with shame 
        and stress.

"Keep it together." 
    "Smile."
        "Don't show pain."

The shadows 
    of our early rules
        remain,

darkening our minds 
    and moods,
        until

we learn to see 
    and rewrite them
        at will.

In the notebook

This part is hard,
but you’re finding your way.
Compassion to you.
Things will be okay.

In the notebook

I’m also including my journal entry that led to the composition of this little song. Here’s the text (with some editing):

I’m in the midst of these long days*…I’m trying to take care of myself as best I can.

Practicing self-compassion—like literally speaking words of self-compassion to myself (in my mind)—helps a lot.

While driving this morning, I heard my thoughts spiraling in feelings of despair about the struggles and the ways in which I’m “failing” my kids. I then managed to consciously intervene and say, “I’m in the process of finding my way/our way with these struggles. We just had a hard morning.** We’ll be okay.” That helped very much.

*of dance class rehearsals/recitals, school, work, and tiredness

**It was a morning of multiple kid meltdowns.

Perfect
   is what
      you don't have to be
         anymore.
The one
   this life
      that you're living
         is for
is you!
   Beautiful human
      you are--
messes and all--
   your molecules came
      from a star.

In the notebook

The hungry mouth of suffering

needs compassion

        on compassion

          on compassion.

In the notebook

You don't have to bully yourself anymore.
It's not your fault life is so hard.
Being kind to yourself, as though to a friend,
will serve you better by far.

In the notebook

Ego is a puppet of tomorrow,
chasing phantom safety without end,
trying to own what it can only borrow,
not realizing its power is pretend.

A creature who is real lives in the moment,
navigating through experience,
allowing feelings, so the mind stays open
to take in facts and choose next acts with sense.

It's not poor ego's fault it's so deluded.
It's like a child in the wild alone:
it needs a bigger mind to help and soothe it--
one who's real and now, not puppet-sewn.

For those who grew in fear instead of care
now must learn to care for fear still there.

In the notebook

You’re clinging, nerves wringing,
to an illusion of control.

You can let go, little ego.
Take my hand. We're here and whole.

In the notebook

Whenever you go to create,

look inside you, not outside--

not what others say and make--

follow what lights up your mind.

In the notebook

Emerson connection

Welcome, new hero.
  You have the right
    to your own choices:
      it's your life!

Pushing back 
  against the ones
    who held you back
      is just step one:

now you step 
  up to the throne
    and rule your life
      like it's your own.

In the notebook

It’s not my job 
  to control how things go
or to keep others happy.
  I can’t, anyhow.

It is my job
  to attend to the needs
of my body and mind
  in the here and now. 

In the notebook

Winter does its duty,
then spring shakes its booty
till summer's indolence--
then fall restores sense.

I'm grateful for the chance
to join this earthy dance.

In the notebook

Good thing I don’t have to defend 
myself in your esteem. 

My happiness does not depend 
on what you think of me.

In the notebook

This one is from several months ago; I found it and decided to give it life, because I do chronically need this perspective reminder.

It's okay to stay inside my shell--
to be quiet, still, and close to myself.
I don't have to constantly spell
out my status for everyone else.

Like a turtle, I can wait
with quiet as my shield and home
until I'm ready to relate,
calmer for the time alone.

In the notebook

This one took a few tries—and the concept will probably generate a few more poems, at least, before I’m done with it, because of how important this learning is being in my life. (My recent poem “It’s okay to stay in here” was another similar attempt.) (For more about the content I’m working with, see my essay “Speaking Less, Sparkling More.”) Claiming the right to speak less is significantly improving my quality of life!!

There is always change
in the world outside,
so look to arrange
my world inside. 

~~
Il y a toujours du changement
dans le monde à l’extérieur,
alors regarde l’arrangement 
de mon monde à l’intérieur.

In the notebook

It's okay to stay in here.
Let boundaries counter fear.

   I don't have to leave myself
   to placate everyone else.
 
      That was life before.
      Now my life is more.

   I'm learning to protect
   my needs and self-respect--

to stay on my own side
and in my core abide.

In the notebook

Slow down.
  I'm okay.
Let my feelings
  point the way.

Life is hard,
  but I can choose
how to meet
  each moment's news.

In the notebook

Enlightenment is to healing
what flowers are to blooms--
same vibrance under different names,
like air in different rooms--

and just like flowers, both of these
need time and space to thrive--
and courage to face what's underground
and open to new life.

In the notebook